Chowtime – 12/8
Just in case you were to busy this week picking out old retro looking sweaters for your Student Ministry Christmas party, here are 5 student ministry focused blog posts that I found interesting from the past week. So grab some Christmas cookies and chow down on these...
- Josh Griffin talks about some Best Practices of Youth Ministry.
- As Grant Diamond transitions into being a Senior Pastor, here are his lessons learned of his time in Youth Ministry
- Jeremy Zach posts about reaching our artists in the community
- Amy Fenton Lee shares about activity pages for students with special needs
- Ever thought of doing a Parent/Student Minister Conference? Here are some thoughts and a great discussion.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
- Chowtime – 5/11
- Looking for a new Minister or Church, ask this group to help
- the Monday Morning Debrief: Eyeing New Leaders
Ministry Lessons from Softball
This fall, I had the privilege of being an Assistant Coach for one of my daughter's softball teams. It was a really cool experience for me to participate in an activity with my daughter. While I was helping during one game, I realized that there were some parallels between softball and ministry. Here's a few...
- You can learn a lot from watching. Sitting on the bench with the other coaches, you are constantly observing. You are looking at how the girls are fielding, pitching and hitting. As you observe, you are able to take notes and then talk to them in order to help them get better at what they are doing. This led me to think, do we have people observing us and our ministry to help us get better at what we are doing? Also, when was the last time you watched someone else's youth program to see what they are doing and how you can get better at what you are doing?
- Parents. I saw a lot of things from parents this season. There were some that were the loving, encouraging kind - always rooting on their girls no matter what. But there were also some who were really hard on their girls, almost critical of their every step in how they talk to them and try to get them to get better. What kind of leader are you? An encourager or a critical one?
- It's all about teamwork. The more the team works together, the more likely they are to stop runs from scoring when they are playing in the field and also score runs when they are batting. How well is your team working together? Are you working as a team or a bunch of individuals?
Three simple ministry thoughts that came from my experience being an Assistant Coach for my daughter's softball team. What do you think? Are there other sports correlations to ministry that you have observed in the past? TAKE A MINUTE right now and share your own sports-related lessons you have learned that translate into ministry.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
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Chowtime – 10/6
In case you were too busy getting lost in a corn maze or scared to death in a Field of Fear, here are 4 Student Ministry blog posts from this past week that are noteworthy:
- Benjamin Kerns asks the question if you can love Jesus and Halloween at the same time.
- Youth Leaders Academy shares 5 things NOT to post on Social Media sites
- Want to motivate your leaders? Michael Bayne shares 7 ways to do that.
- Joshua Griffin talks about a quick win with parents.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
- Chowtime – 5/11
- Looking for a new Minister or Church, ask this group to help
- the Monday Morning Debrief: Eyeing New Leaders
the BLACKBOARD: Some of the best contact work I’ve ever done
I know I've written about it before and I'm pretty adament about it, but last week I volunteered at my daughters school and literally, it was some of the best contact work I've ever done. Here's why...
- I got to see my girls. Seeing your children in a different environment and setting is always enlightening because you get to see them interact with their friends and teachers in a way unlike any other time. School is THEIR territory, not mine so seeing them in their own environment was great.
- I ran into several students from the neighborhood that I know and they got to see a father (not a mother - mothers are always in the school helping) as a positive contributor to the school. So many fathers are busy at work and don't have the flexibility in their schedules like ministers do. Mothers are in the schools regularly so having a father in their contributing and involved is always nice. And, just like seeing my own children, I get to see neighborhood kids in a different environment and see how they act at school.
- I had good conversations with teachers and other administrators. This wasn't my 1st time volunteering and it certainly won't be my last so going to school I got to connect with other teachers (all who know what I do for a living) and administrators and catch up on them and their families. Developing those stronger bonds is always good in breaking down barriers between what they may think about ministers and churches. The more I interact and get to know them, the more likely they will think of me and my church if/when something hurtful or tragic happens at the school or in their lives.
- I saw other parents from around the neighborhood and got to talk to them. As parents came in to volunteer and eat lunch with their own children, I got to say, "hi" and talk to them about life in general. Simple conversations over and over again go a long way.
My hope is that times like these are not "wasted" time as I have "real" work to do in my office or out with teens. Rather, it all fits into my plan to minister to families, especially families within my neighborhood which is about 5-7 minutes away from the Church. As I did contact work with multiple groups of people, the more interaction I get with them, the more I earn the right to be heard by them. And, the more I earn their trust and confidence as they begin to share and trust me with their lives.
Contact work is contact work as long as you continue to build new relationships, develop the relationships you currently have and continually earn the right to be heard with them all. I can't wait to see how all these relationships I am developing with elementary school aged children now help the growth of my "ministry" when they get into middle school and high school.
So what do you think? What has been some of your best contact work experience? TAKE A MINUTE right now and post your best contact work you have ever done and why so that we can all learn and benefit.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
- Chowtime – 5/11
- Looking for a new Minister or Church, ask this group to help
- the Monday Morning Debrief: Eyeing New Leaders
NO ONE showed up! What the heck?
Yep, that's right. On Tuesday, I did an event and NO ONE showed up. Now, over my time in youth ministry, I've had a few events where just a small handful came, but at least I had a few people show. This week NO ONE showed up! The Big ZERO, Nada, Zilch, Null. Have you ever had that happened before?
So, as I processed this, I began to wonder where did I go wrong and I came up with a few conclusions:
- Wrong Promotion. For starters, even though I have it on the summer calendar and highlighted it on my weekly emails to parents, I didn't have it highlighted in the church services at all in the weeks leading up to the event. And, I failed to promote it and talk about it to students enough.
- No personal invites. So this event is a brand new event, never been done before and hardly any students knew about it. Let's be honest, they don't check emails or calendars you mail to them anymore. They need leaders talking to them, texting them, tweeting them and Facebooking them personally (sorry, Google+ no one goes to your site). When a leaders calls up a student and personally invites them to something, the chances of them coming to that event dramatically increases (I would love someone to do a study on that alone...anyone?). And, none of that happened this past week...not even from me, the Youth "Guy". So, if students don't know about it and aren't invited to it, how can we expect them to come to it?
- No student input. Probably the biggest error of my ways is that I didn't process this idea with students. I thought it would be a good idea to try but I never ran it by students to see if they thought it was good. For all I know they could have known about the program but thought it was too stupid of an idea to come to. How would I know...I never asked them.
So there you have it. No one showed up because I failed to do a few things that, after 14 years of youth ministry, I should definitely have known to do.
What do you think? Have you ever had an experience like this? What have you learned from that and how did the next time you did that event reflect the changes you made? TAKE A MINUTE right now and share your thoughts, experiences or comments so we can all learn and benefit.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
- Chowtime – 5/11
- Looking for a new Minister or Church, ask this group to help
- the Monday Morning Debrief: Eyeing New Leaders
Chowtime 6/9
In case you are so stuffed from all the graduation parties you have been to and have been out of the loop, here are some of the goings on from some youth ministry bloggers. So grab some chow and enjoy...
- Grant Diamond looks at the disciples and encourages us in our relationship with Christ.
- Joshua Griffin discusses some practical ideas of how to partner with parents.
- Jeremy Zach talks about a dream come true (for me at least) - what to do when unchurched students come to youth group
- Benjamin Kerns talks about pouring into leaders
If you have other articles or bloggers you follow that have posted something great this week, post it on the comments below so we can all benefit.
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- the Monday Morning Debrief: Changes gone array
- Chowtime – 5/11
- Looking for a new Minister or Church, ask this group to help
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Book Review: Holy Parenting: Making the Common Sacred
"I do have to confess: every chapter in this book is me trying to live into something that is not fully developed...Each of these things I have shared is something I have tried, failed at, and tried again. While I still haven't mastered any of these things, I am firmly committed to figuring it out."
That is Benjamin Kerns writing towards the end of his book, "Holy Parenting: Making the Common Sacred". And that is why I LOVED this book. Practically every chapter is written in a way where I could immediately identify with him. As a father of 4 daughters and a minister myself, I have felt what he has felt before. I have agonized where he agonized. I have been frustrated where he was frustrated. In all the different parenting books I have read (not a huge list), I can say that Benjamin's book is the 1st book that I couldn't put down and needed to keep reading more and more because he seemed to get real, actual parenting (and the struggles that come about).
He has 3 great sections, all focusing on different aspects of parenting: Accepting Your New Life, Raising Little Children is a Spiritual Discipline and Vital Rhythms for Spiritual Growth. When I read through each of theses sections and the chapters that followed, it just seemed like these situations were the exact same as mine, especially since we are both in ministry. For years I guilted myself thinking that I was the only one encountering this or that and that I must be a bad parent because I wasn't able to do what I wanted to do. But not only does Ben communicate in a way that makes you identify with him and his situation, he provides great insight on ways that you can counter that...not as an expert, but as one who is really trying to be the best father and husband he can be.
So if you are looking for a "get real" type of book in which you can actually relate to the author and his experiences, you need to pick this up at the Amazon Store. Especially if you in a ministry position and have a family, you need to grab this book. I highly recommend this book! It is available in Paperback and Kindle.
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- Orange ’13: 2nd Friday Morning General Session Notes
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Orange Week: Game Changer
Last year the Orange Conference theme was "Move" and they challenged all the participants constantly by saying, "it's your move". This year the theme is "Game Changer".
As I thought about this theme, I thought of a few game changing moments in my ministry. One game changing decision I made years ago was in regards to parent involvement. When I first got involved in youth ministry I didn't want as many parents involved because I felt like I wanted my ministry to be a service to them. I wanted to take care of their kids and give them a break. Although I had nothing personal against them serving with the youth ministry, I didn't see any real benefits to their help either.
Then, through a series of evaluations and processing with others, I felt that if we were going to have the impact I desired in ministry, we needed parents to be more involved. As I had parents more involved, I saw the benefits they offered.
Some of those benefits were:
- They could be a positive role model, showing teens that parents do care and are involved, in a healthy way, in the life of their children
- Parents are normally very reliable. The bottom line is that they want to help. After all, they help with sport teams, school activities and community events. Why wouldn’t they be able to help with church stuff? So having some extra bodies around to help set up, clean up, serve and be there with the students was something I could trust they would do really well. I could rely on them.
- By having parents involved, it provides an extra avenue of promotion because they will be telling all their friends who have teens that they are coming and encourage them to come.
- It takes the burden off of you to do one more thing. For example, providing food for an event. If parents help out and serve in this capacity, you can focus on other details of the event rather than worrying about every little detail.
The benefits of having parents involved are there. It benefitted me years ago and it still benefits me today. The perfect example was the Super Bash '12 that we did (I'll be blogging about next week). Without their help and support, our Super Bash would have never been as successful as it was. And when I decided to really utilize them in my ministry, that became a GAME CHANGER for me.
What about you? TAKE A MINUTE right now and share a game changing moment in your ministry.
Oh, and while you are at it, don't forget to sign up for Orange '12 right here. You won't regret it.
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GUEST POST: Technology Tethered
This Guest Post is from Blake Dumais. Along with our friend Mark Seager, Blake & I meet up regularly as we discuss life, politics, raising children and theological issues. Like what he has to say? Follow him and all his wild adventures at @bdumais15
As an old guy and cyber-immigrant looking out for his soon to be thirteen year old daughter, I took the Facebook plunge a couple of years ago to find out what all the buzz was about. In nothing flat, I was obsessively updating my status and dancing a victory jig as I passed my wife’s “friends” total. Baby’s have their pacifiers tethered to their onesies while everyone else is tethered to iPhones. Technology isn’t going away, so rather than worry about it, I want to teach my kids about another tether, the one that will lead to their past.
When I Google my name, I see a single obscure hit about a race I ran twenty years ago. And no, I really didn’t set the 50-55 age record in 1991 like it says. Although it’s nice to hold a record that will never be broken. There is nothing on what schools I attended, what I “like” or who my “friends” are. In fact, I am very happy that I have such an anonymous past and that no one (read: my kids) can read about my misspent youth. Those days are over. Our children’s every key stroke, search and upload with be part of the ether forever. After our little cyber-natives have been logging on for a few years, what will they have revealed about themselves to the world? Our kids could find themselves painted into a digital box, built by inappropriate status updates, compromising pictures, revealing cell phone videos and other posts that will exist in perpetuity. The possible repercussions are ominous but we hardly give them a second thought. Prospective colleges and employers won’t have applications, they’ll simply see an online persona. I want people to have a chance to meet my daughter, without preconceptions, and to get to know her as a person rather than a profile.
And no, the answer isn’t to forbid Facebook in my house like some horse and buggy driving, anti-technology zealot. Kids need to learn to use the cultural medium without succumbing to the cultural message. How to think before they post, how to say no to being somewhere they shouldn’t be, before the picture or video gets uploaded. I really want people to know my daughter for who she is, rather than who they think she is based on a Google search. I pray that with God’s guidance, her mother and I have prepared her; given her the power to say no, the wisdom to choose good friends (the old fashioned flesh and blood kind), and shown her where to draw some basic lines. Her day on Facebook is just about here and I will happily let her post away. I pray that, like Paul, she will be able to say:
I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. (Philippians 1:20)
P.S. While I am planning a come back in the race to have more “friends” than my wife, I am on Facebook hiatus. But that’s a story for another post.
Possibly Related Posts:
- What are you reading?
- the BLACKBOARD: Making an impact in the Community
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- Some Ministry Lessons Learned from the Battle of Gettysburg
- Always teaching
Connect:
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